Part # 1:
Momma sez I haf ta make sure ta let Da Eberbodies know that Ize not downplaying what beze goin on all ober da world AT ALL!. Dis is a bit of wots Ize been seein thru mine own Houndie eyebrols, N hopefully will give uze a smile. It duz haf been a long time since Ize done a lot a dictatin. *clears throat* dat’s because da staff can’t seem to do more than 2-3 fings at a time no matter how much hers hafs been counseled..
As hoomans wot beze supposed to haf such a wide bocabulary in a gzillion languages, N beze soopa intelektual, theys named sumpin dis serious N dedly after Beer? And… a beer wot gets limes stuck down in da bottle to make it taste better?
Now I realize dat bein of da hound persuazhun, weze duzunt use da much sot after Toilet Paper. Weze just efficiently and economically air dry. N on da rare okashun weze need T.P., theys always da grass. It works bery nicely. No fuss No muss!
I digress. Seriously It’s like hoomans growed an extra butt or wuz gonna triple da number of times they powder theys nose N take care of theys business. Someone on da internet did do research, N a 12 pack of Toilet Paper, can last one hooman about one year. * If it beze on da internet, it Must be True!!!*
Da Princess Toolip did poll a lot of our houndie friends, N ob korse we would be more than happy to share our outside facilities. Howeber, rember all da times u made us go out in da rain? Weze not holdin a ‘brella ober uze head either.
Who knewed that a respiratory virus, all be it a bery serious N skeery one kud turn hoomans inta gigantic sponges? Now, I understand dat dependin on where uze lif, tap water may not beze Perrier quality, but. people work wif me here. Inquirin houndies wants ta noze whyfore all da water keeps disappearin from da store shelves?
N this beze a smorl issue in da skeem of fings, but eben our beloved Pbutter hafs been ravaged. Is nufin sacred??
Part # 2:
Us Houndies as a whole duz fink social distancing at, 6’ beze a no brainer. Most of us hafs 6’ leashes for walkins. Ya duznt see us bezin all up on top of each other when weze out N about.
Now hafin pointed out da ‘diculousness of sum hoomans, da beer virus hafs also brought out the bestest in gazillions of em. Theys a teenage hoopup wot tookded hims allowance N beze makin lunches for da truck drivers wot can’t find places ta eat while theys bringin supplies N foods. Neighbors beze takin care of each other. Sum hoomans are eben walkin houndies if theys parunts isn’t able to go outside.
Teenage hoopups from a ball team in Jacksonville boughted food for At Risk Seniors N delivered it to them. Police persons beze taking time out of theys shifts to read to read to hoopups.
Lots of hoomans from all over beze raisin money N donatin protective gear for da Furst Responders. Wonderful Food Type Hoomans beze makin, donatin, N deliberin meals to Furst Responders. N theys others wot beze volunteerin to watch theys hoopups N hoopupettes, soze da furst responders can do theys best to take care of all da rest of da hoomans.
Lots N lots of hoomans clap. whistle N cheer for the drs, nurses, firemens, N policemens when theys come by. Hoopups haf made Get Well Soon Cards for hoomans in Quarantine. Some healthcare workers eben came out of theys hospital N found wonderful messages for them on da sidewalk in sidewalk chalk.
I kud goze on N on wif da good fings this horrible, ugly, skeery N sumtimes dedly virus hafs growd all ober the world, Da selfless giving of theys selves for others far outweighs da skeered selfish fings wot wuz dun by sum homans in da beginnin.
Search For Ways Uze Can Help
Luffs NY Vinny & Princess Toolip